we are young and stupid and raised by wolves
(this is not real life. these are not pictures of me. I am 25 years old and a woman and passionate about politics and fanfiction and, as far as you are concerned, I only exist online.)
me most of the time: people are okay, I guess. like no one is 100% bad.
me after reading the comments section in any article, ever: this world can only be cleansed with fire.
In my senior year of college, I wrote a fucking creative nonfiction essay about my internet friends who were sometimes my only friends in my high school years, and especially how wonderful it was to talk to them every day when my speech impediment made it agonizing to talk in RL.
when i die i want to be buried wearing a pair of sunglasses so that a few decades down the line i will also be a cool skeleton
26,473 notes. 26,473 people identified with this statement. if even half that many people actually did this, can you imagine how confused future archaeologists would be
"In the end of the twenty-first century, a new grave good phenomenon spread rapidly in a global, decentralized fashion. In the relevant burials, the deceased would be buried with a pair of non-functioning spectacles fastened to their face; in many cases, the pair was anchored quite firmly into the skull (as-Sabah 2839), as though to make sure that it would not come off if the burial was disturbed.
"The significance of this grave good arrangement is unknown. The glasses vary wildly. One adolescent skeleton was found buried with a pair that chemical analyses indicate was bright pink at the time of burial and made of plastics common in twenty-first century excavations, and carved with an anthropomorphic image of a cat on one corner (Bao 2836). Another example was a finely manufactured pair, affixed with post-mortem stapling to a middle aged man’s skull, which had been plated with gold and had several small diamonds affixed, although much of the gold had come unfastened from the core in the intervening time (Jensen 2841). The main thing that all the glasses have in common is that, in contrast to the rarer, functional eyeglasses buried with a few individuals in previous years — presumably those who had used them in life, as spectacles were a common early method of vision correction (Zhang 2833) — the lenses are plain tinted glass. Their primarily function seems to have been to obscure the vision of the wearer.
"The reasoning for burying the dead with these items has been speculated on widely without much consensus. The most popular theory is that it is related to early twenty-first century cynicism; at the same time as the beginning of cynicism’s century-long dominance of serious philosophy and beginning just before the first Data War and escalating throughout it, many ceased to put faith in old religious ideas of a just world and peaceful afterlife and returned to less optimistic versions of their faiths. The glasses may have been meant to shield the wearers in the afterlife by limiting their visions and knowledge of it (Gonzoles 2840) an idea that was known to exist at the time and would develop further in the Cult of the Hammer and Cross, among other similar groups that dominated religious beliefs following the collapse of major world powers in the later half of the twenty-first century (Werlinich 2837)."
Mum: Can I borrow your laptop?
Me: *Deletes History*
Me: *Logs out of tumblr*
Me: *Double checks deleted history*
Me: *Close Chrome*
Me: *Open Internet Explorer*
line from the 1999 movie “Netforce”
I…I don’t know what it means…
But I love this description of the movie:
You know that stereotype about older people and computers, how they use Internet Explorer with 26 toolbars and make phone calls to their kids for step-by-step instructions on how to log into Facebook? If you took that exact person and asked them to write a three-and-a-half hour movie about cybercops who battled Internet crime, you would still end up with something that had a slightly better grasp of technology than NetForce.
Based on a series of novels by 132-year-old writer Tom Clancy, NetForce follows the adventures of Alex Michaels (Scott Bakula), who takes charge of the FBI’s NetForce division in the not-too-distant future of 2005, a time when “technology has outstripped our morality.” Michaels is something of a loose cannon, to the point where he even goes so far as to time-jump an e-warrant that he got from a virtual courtroom — and I swear that these are actually things grown-ups were paid to say to each other while standing in front of cameras — but he gets the job when his boss, Kris Kristofferson, “one of the major architects of the internet,” is assassinated.
This is a video of the best quotes from the movie. Omg.
Google and Facebook: Hey, wouldn't it be great if we linked ALL YOUR THINGS???
Me: No, I like my social and internet life segmented and disparate, thank you.
why so glitchy, Chrome
you’re lucky you’re as beloved as you are, I would never accept this behavior from any other browser